2002-01-01
Good Morning Faithful Ones,
God leads me to continue writing about the oneness of covenant as it applies to marriage. Yesterday’s message dealt with Christ’s teaching from MT 19 on marriage and divorce. Let me repeat MT 19: 11 as a segue into what I’m directed to write today. “Jesus answered, ‘This teaching [referring to what I discussed yesterday] does not apply to everyone, but only to those to whom God has given it.’” This answer was given in response to His disciples comments after hearing Him say in (9), “I tell you, then, that any man who divorces his wife, even though she has not been unfaithful, commits adultery if he marries some other woman.” Their response in (10) had been, “If this is how it is between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry.” What Christ meant in (11) is that they cannot live a celibate life unless they are called to it. Our Lord elaborates on this in (12), “For there are different reasons why men cannot marry: some, because they were born that way; others, because men made them that way; and others do not marry for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. Let him who can accept this teaching do so.’” While I plan to write about the single life later, let’s return to the issue of marriage and divorce for now.
One writer that I read on this subject expressed the opinion that God also gave the concessions on divorce to Moses found in DT 24: 1-4 for the merciful protection of womankind. Read these words written regarding people living from 1250-1210 BC and ask for God’s direction if we should agree. “Suppose a man marries a woman and later decides that he does not want her, because he finds something about her that he does not like. So he writes out divorce papers, gives them to her, and sends her away from his home. Then suppose she marries another man, and he also decides that he doesn’t want her, so he also writes out divorce papers, gives them to her, and sends her away from his home. Or suppose her second husband dies. In either case, her first husband is not to marry her again; he is to consider her defiled. If he married her again, it would be offensive to the Lord. You are not to commit such a terrible sin in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.” It is clear from this that God recognized that something had to be done about marriages that weren’t in line with God’s will for whatever reason.
Some citations from the Psalms give us insight into the heart of God. PS 84: 11, “He is our protector and glorious King, blessing us with honor and kindness.” PS 147: 3, “He heals the broken-hearted and bandages their wounds.” God recognizes the inherent cruelty of a man’s adultery against his wife. Since procreation of children faithful to Him is one of God’s purposes in marriage, He certainly knows that divorce doesn’t serve that purpose. This issue is taken up in MAL 2: 15-16, “Did not God make you one body and spirit with her? What was His purpose in this? It was that you should have children who are truly God’s people. So make sure that none of you breaks his promise to his wife. ‘I hate divorce,’ says the Lord God of Israel. ‘I hate it when one of you does such a cruel thing to his wife. Make sure that you do not break your promise to be faithful to your wife.’” I feel compelled to reiterate that God hates divorce, but He does not hate divorced people. Is God realistic? Of course, He is. God knows that some people are not faithful to their spouses and wants us to understand that there are bad consequences associated with making such unwise choices. It’s one of the reasons that we are commanded to take our time in selecting who we marry and to be sure that our marriages are three-way sacred covenants between ourselves, our spouses, and the Lord God.
Up to this point, we have examined the ideal marriage as God would wish it to be. However, we all know that some marriages go awry. 1 COR 7: 10-15 deals with some questions about marriage. “For married people I have a command which is not my own but the Lord’s: a wife must not leave her husband; but if she does, she must remain single or else be reconciled to her husband; and a husband must not divorce his wife. To the others I say (I, myself, not the Lord): if a Christian man has a wife who is an unbeliever and she agrees to go on living with him, he must not divorce her. And if a Christian woman is married to a man who is an unbeliever and he agrees to go on living with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made acceptable to God by being united to his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made acceptable to God by being united to her Christian husband. If this were not so, their children would be like pagan children; but as it is, they are acceptable to God. However, if the one who is not a believer wishes to leave the Christian partner, let it be so. In such cases the Christian partner, whether husband or wife, is free to act. God has called you to live in peace.” To understand what is acceptable to God, I believe each individual circumstance must be evaluated based on God’s purpose for marriage, the circumstances in which the marriage was carried out, whether every effort had been made to preserve the union in Godliness, and who might be damaged physically or spiritually if a troubled marriage goes on. While God hates divorce, there are some circumstances where it is the only way to establishing a life of greater faithful obedience to Him. More tomorrow on this subject.
PRAYER: O Lord, the direction You have given us in the Scriptures forces us to realize that marriage is intended (as are all our covenants with You) to be a solemn, binding agreement. However, because of mankind’s disobedience, You gave a concession to Moses in DT 24: 1-4 for Your children. You also have great compassion for wives who have been the victims of adultery on the part of their husbands. For reason, You made it clear how much You detest this behavior in MAL 2: 15-16. Still, not every situation regarding the breakdown of a marriage is discussed in these two teachings. That is why You gave us more about this in 1 COR 7. In connection with Your basic motive to see us move forward in the process of sanctification, we acknowledge that we often have not taken Your teaching on marriage seriously enough. That is why You direct us to have a better understanding of its importance to our lives and to the carrying out of Your will. Once we understand Your will for marriages, we will form them with greater consideration for Your stated purposes, we will come to the marriage commitment with honor and fidelity, we will establish homes that will be a nurturing place for children to become believers, and we will only divorce if saving the marriage would thwart greater faith in You or damage others. We bow to Your will in these matters and approach You in humility with our adoration, worship, loyalty, diligence, trust, obedience, honor, glory, praise, and thanks for Your presence in our lives. In Christ’s name, amen.
There are still many topics associated with the covenant of marriage to discuss. So, we will go on with that tomorrow. There are times when God’s teaching commands us to make difficult, painful choices. However, God knows that for us to come in line with His will that we must face these mid-course corrections with faithful trust and obedience. He never brings pain into our lives for evil reasons. His motives are always designed to bring us to the point eventually where we can enjoy eternal joy and fellowship with Him in heaven. That is one way out of many that He demonstrates the profound love He has for each of us. Peter and I send you our love too.
Grace Be With You Always,
Lynn