2021-12-03
Good Morning Dear Ones,
Last week I was commanded by the Holy Spirit to define various aspects of the word agape [the Greek word for the kind of love that God has for us] using their Greek descriptions. We learned that agape love: 1) always perseveres; 2) always hopes; 3) always trusts; 4) always protects; 5) never fails. Let me share two very important verses from the Scriptures to demonstrate these principles. JN 3: 16, “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” GA 5: 22-23, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things as these, there is no law.” Substituting the word “agape” for the word “love” in each of these Scriptures is helpful.
Part of maturing is realizing that we are going to sometimes connect with people in our lives who don’t love us. One’s first experiences with this difficulty can be and are often painful. If such a person is in one’s own family, that predicament adds to how painful it can be. As parents, the most difficult challenge in life for which there is little preparatory training, we walk a thin line between letting children deal with the emotional pain of people who don’t like them and protecting them from such pain. This experience is the beginning of learning how to make lasting friendships. One learns from it what criteria makes good friendships or the lack of them. My own experience was to learn the hard way who should not be a friend. Truthfully, I was toward the end of my teen years before I stopped pulling the wrong people into my life and who would make a good friend. It’s a useful exercise to make a list of criteria that bars friendship or that leads to lasting ones. I find, for example, lazy, stupid, dishonest, violent, gossiping, people don’t make good friends. On the other hand, people who are honest, kind, faithful, peaceful, dignified, intelligent, self-disciplined, etc. have a better chance of being a good friend. The question arises, what should one do if the person who is not lovable is in one’s family? This unhappy situation challenges people in particularly painful ways. If it is someone who doesn’t live in the same household, then keeping one’s distance is easier. Many families have someone like this in them. If it is someone who lives in the same household, what should be done to lessen the pain depends on the relationship. Prayer for self-control, keeping one’s mouth shut, is often the best that can be done, unless the problem is illegal, unmoral, or unsafe. Then, the authorities can be brought in. If it is a bad marriage and all efforts to solve the problems have been tried, then divorce and custody matters can be brought up with the courts. Divorce is always painful and should not be anything but a last resort.
There is no question that God wants us to be loving people, ones that use Christ as our Paradigm in that respect. When we are loving, others find it easier to love us. 1 JN 3: 9, “No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s Seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God.” 1 JN 3: 11, “This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another.” An obediently loving person, one that is consistently loving (as God loves us), sets an example that leads to others loving us. I’ve had the experience of seeing how powerful an example like that can be. Three times in my life, I had others say wrongful things, things which disrespect me. I used all the self-control I could muster and didn’t answer back in kind. Over a period of time, each of these three acquaintances came to a reversal in his thinking and wrote a letter of apology to me. In each case, I forgave this unfriendly behavior and brought emotional peace to my life and my friend’s.
PRAYER: O Lord, when trouble in a relationship happens, we can learn a lot from You. You are a forgiving God; one that doesn’t hold grudges when, after a time, wrongful behavior is corrected. Open and honest confession before You is good for us, since You often forgive us. Being forgiving toward others is also good for us. COL 3: 13, “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Being humble benefits us, as it reminds us of our place with You. You are always wiser than we are,you’re your mysterious blessing is Christ within us. Humility is yet another benefit that helps us on the way to gaining eternal life. PR 22: 4-5, “Humility and the fear of the Lord bring wealth and honor and life. In the paths of the wicked lie thorns and snares, but he who guards his soul stays far from them.” We offer You praise and thanks for Your love, goodness, grace, and kindness. In Christ’s holy/mighty name, we pray. Amen.
NEXT WEEK: I’ve been commanded by the Holy Spirit to write next week about agape’s action and it’s transformative effect on our lives. Several years ago, I wrote about one of the most difficult assignments I’ve received in my faith walk. It was to tape three pieces of 8 ½” X 11” paper together in portrait configuration. I was to draw a horizontal line and then divide it in five equal sections. Within in each section perpendicular to the line, I was to write all the significant milestones in my life. This exercise forced me to compare my life before and after the Lord Jesus entered into it. I had to remember things I wanted to forget from my past. How little self-esteem I had been raised with jumped up at me! The effect of feeling emotionally unprotected couldn’t be missed. Statements like, “children should be seen but not heard,” acted as a knife cutting right through me. I can even remember so long ago when my parents spelled words I couldn’t know over my head, so I wouldn’t understand “adult speak.” I was the youngest child of the four of us, so I was always the one with the least clout in the family. Parenting today is very different that it was in my day, and a lot has been improved since then. Our Lord has taught us what agape really is.
Grace Be With You Always,
Lynn
JS 24: 15
© Lynn Johnson 2021. All Rights Reserved
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